So for work, one of my self-assigned tasks it to reach out to pop culture blogs and create partnerships. And the one that I cared about most was Stuff White People Like, I mean…I’m kind of in love with the blog. (In a clearly I know I can’t marry a blog sort of way, of course).

But, Christian Lander, the creator of the blog, emailed me back (and yes, for all of you that paused in shock…that was a real name written there). And I may have run around the office with a happy dance, jump and smile (one of the interns claims I did I happy clog and not a happy dance). All in all though, I got to meet him tonight. It’s like the life goal I forgot about. I mean meeting Christian is right up there with me wanting to meet Deb of smittenkitchen, it just needs to happen.

But he signed my book, took a photo with me and my coworkers, and is going to work with my office. The happy dance I’m doing is never-ending and possibly all internal now as I sit and yawn on my couch.

SOOOOOOOOO HAPPY!!! And if you’re wondering why a Kitchen-Aid is mentioned in the title…it’s cause I self-identify with #54 on the Stuff White People Like List, kitchen gadgets, mostly these three paragraphs:

But, in order for them to truly enter into whitedom, they need to own the holy grail of white kitchens - the kitchen aid stand mixer. They will match this mixer to their kitchen’s color scheme and it will make up the focal point. And much like many religious artifacts, it will remain untouched for months and even years, sitting on the counter to be admired as a testament to their lifestyle.

Kitchen Gadgets also serve as one of the main reasons why white people get married. Look at their registry and you will find gadgets for any possible task in the kitchen. If you end up buying one of these for a white person, your card should make reference to them using a lot to make beautiful food that you hope you can eat one day. This kind of stuff goes over like gang busters.

…you should just throw out a combination of these words: “le Creuset, Calphalon, All Clad, Williams Sonoma, and Sur Le Table.” White people go so nuts when they hear these words, you won’t even have to finish your sentence.

However, to this all I have to say is….my lemongrass green Kitchen-Aid mixer is the center point of my small kitchen, purchased at Williams Sonoma, and I didn’t have to get married and register for it…I just had to graduate from college (cause that is how ridiculous I am).

**Follow-up: I know I’m not white. But people, just let me go on this one. I’ll come back to my usual confused multi-cultural, bi-racial self after the euphoric buzz wears off.

While introducing Law School Friend [also known as my future life partner] to Iron Chef America:

“Awwwwwwww, rabbits. Awwwww, carrots…..They are cooking it with carrots! That’s [long pause]…like cooking you with cupcakes.”

I wish I could capture her facial expressions, she’s just compared it with a cooking horror movie.

**introduction: We have met the season 5 Project Runway designers and at this point it almost seems fruitless to learn all of their names. Because I mean there are a ton of them, all with quirky personalities. They met Heidi and Tim, and then after an evening of celebrating their making it to NY, Tim Gunn woke them up at 4am for their first challenge. Good Job Tim.

11:12 — Austin from the first season appears because, well, it is another Gristedes challange (and as Tim Gunn says, we’ve come full circle).  Austin takes flamboyant to a whole new level. I mean when he came skipping across the street in his little sailor outfit I may have almost fallen off the couch in shock. And then he just hopped to attention, I mean for serious, there was a ruffle around his neck.

11:13 — Boy with the short shorts. Okay, let’s be honest, I was still judging the shirt he was wearing in the intro sequence. But it appears the short shorts are his thing. [added post show: and in fact in the preview for net week he's in the shorts again, it appears to be his thing].

11:13 — To take a page out of the Gossip Girls handbook…omfg [the clean version], the girl with the visible, wear on the outside leather panties. She makes the short shorts boy look acceptable again, and all I want to say is…love if you can’t dress yourself, I think we have a problem…and she has horizontal red and white stripped tight pants/leggings underneath them

11:19 — Wackadoodle. Is that a real word?

11:19 — “To fusilli or not to fusilli” (Because apparently one designer is making an Italian themed dress)

11:20 — Oh snap…some gay animosity has hit the show already. One gay annoyed with another, and girlfriend, there may be a cat fight. All of the word “girlicious…or anything that ends in -icious.

11:25 — I swear they are a tad unoriginal, I mean the number of tablecloths. You were giving a task to got into a grocery store and use whatever they had to make an outfit, and half the group went with a tablecloth, that is not going to reflect well on you.

11:26 — HAHA, Tim Gunn just called out the lazy designers because of the tablecloths. Tsk tsk designers, Tim Gunn just called you unoriginal and lazy, which I also may have thought about one minute ago.

11:32 — Oh heavens, weird-clothing woman thinks she’s going to be eliminated and it’s all she can talk about…this happens to be something we agree on, probably the only thing we’d agree on…cause let’s be honest, she picked the trash bags that she not claims she can’t work with. Cause she picked trash bags that are too thin. The other designers are trying to make her feel better and be encouraging, they haven’t hit the point of hating each other.

11:34 — An outfit was just compared to American Psycho…I think it looks like a cross between that and a designer plumber. But a cute one, not like one of those scary plumbers that bend over and give you an eye full that you pray to God you’ll never see again. Nope, this one looks like a designer plumber that would kill you while you showered.

11:44 — Models are walking, everyone is happy with their final outfit, and they all think (and vocalize) that the judges will be impressed because their outfit is the best. Some of them are wrong, how the mighty will fall. I could be a judge.

11:49 — the top 3 and bottom 3 models are have been selected. The cocktail dress out of cups…FANTASTIC (good job Daniel), and the table cloth dress with the kale, bell peppers and cherry tomatoes, that is the most incredible thing I’ve seen…I mean yes the table cloth isn’t impressive, but whoa did her model look amazing. And then the girl that dyed her own vacuum bags and burned coffee filters…the skirt on her outfit looked great.

11:47 — American Psycho dress….Heidi just compared it to a Plumber, can I say I told him so. Because seriously, the model has rubber boots and yellow dish-washing rubber gloves (which I’m pretty sure he tied around her wrists).

11:50 — Blaine (Girlicious boy who was finished first and thought his outfit was the greatest thing since sliced bread)… well oh snap (maybe even a triple snap), Heidi just called it Playboy bunny gone grunge…so much for him thinking he was the best thing on the runway…I mean I could have told him it wasn’t working, he’s now in the bottom three, so sorry Blaine.

11:52 — yep, American Psycho…it came up again. Micheal Kors compared it to a slasher movie…he’s so gone (or it could be the crazy dresser with the “draped trash bag dress”)

11:57 — Kelly (girl with the vacuum bag dress) won the challenge, which makes me happy cause it was great.  Daniel was in second with the cup dress…which like I said before was amazing.

11:58 — Will it be Jerry (American Psycho) or Stella (trash bag dress)….oooo, it was American Psycho! I mean come on, he made a cape like rain coat and put rubber gloves on his model, but according to him, “I’m a true designer, I make beautiful clothes” (Just not good enough right now).

“ could write a book.
A book about the life I’d like to have lived.
The things I’d like to have done.
Things like writing books.”

Care of one of my co-worker’s favorite website. I had to stop and ponder the things I’d like to have done… the appropriate things :) [in no real order]

• Write a children’s book (something that deals with cookies maybe)
• Sell my baked goods: cookies, muffins and cakes
• Work for a museum or some historic group
• Visit Charm City Cakes in Maryland
• Buy a round-the-world plane ticket…(and maybe be able to be gone for a couple of months)
• Make a wedding cake
• Maybe pop out a kid or two
• Work for the Academy Awards (that may not actually be a reality)

But yeah….the list for now.

“Friends don’t let friends have dalliances…I think it’s supposed to be drunken dalliances, but dalliances none the less” - Rules to live by, care of Lifetime and Army Wives

So this weekend brought together stress, cleaning, food, happy people, a crossword puzzle movie and church. Not necessarily in that order, but close enough.

So Friday night included dinner with friends after work, and then a cleaning/veggie cutting party with my “high society friend,” who I don’t think until this point has had a real blog nickname, thus High Society Friend it is. Needless to say she was fantastic. She came over late in the evening, and chopped veggies for brunch the next day while I cleaned. We hung pictures in my kitchen (care of Deb’s new online photo store through smitten kitchen). We might have drank part of a bottle of prosecco in the process, but everyone needs something happy while they clean :)

Saturday dawned early and brunch seemed like it hit faster then before. And I may have run out of eggs, thus making Law School Friend [LSF] run out to get more. But the coffee brewed, the bacon was cooked, the egg dish fantastic (more about that later on, with a photo taken my A) and the company was fantastic and so random it was perfect. I mean conversation between the conservative and liberals, the friends and interns…and it was great, my interns came, A and her boy toy, Law School Friend, E, S, college friends, co-workers. I mean it was great. And afterwords LSF, S, K and I hung out and watched movies of our childhood, and then later LSF and I watched Wordplay, the crossword puzzle documentary, which was fantastic. If you haven’t seen it, you should…it was intense and it made me want to become apart of the “crossword people.”

Sunday: Only two things happen on Sunday…the farmers market and church. The two things that ground me and prepare me for the week. And really, as I feel like I’ve said before…I LOVE the farmers market in the summer. The colors and the smells and the tastes. I mean every booth is vibrant, and the samples of the fruits: peaches, nectarines, tomatoes, and cheeses. Yummy. The church was equally as vibrant for the soul, although several of us may have almost fallen asleep during the prayers for the people (maybe I haven’t slept as much as I wanted to). But now it’s all about my quiet Sunday evening eating a not balanced meal, blogging and watching Army Wives on Lifetime. All in all…it was a good weekend.

My allergies are going crazy, my parents staying on a compound in a developing country that had the Ebola virus some time ago, my boss may have the most mood swings of anyone I’ve ever met, and I’m hosting brunch on Saturday (and my apartment is a wreck). So, obviously that means I’m writing a list of joy and crisis :)

1. Flights: I hate United Airlines. My boss loves United. They are always double the price. She is a executive points member. I like a bargain. She likes the legroom. I am so done making reservations.
2. Personal Assistant Life: When you are a female assistant, life’s only goal is to screw you over (in a nice way of course). It’s like the Devil Wears Prada, except you don’t get a shoe closet. You find yourself cleaning supply rooms, running errands, and being snapped at for things that aren’t your fault. However, if you are a male assistant…responsibility is handed to you, whether you deserve it or not. I know this cause my old government job just had a boy hired to be my replacement, and no joke…he already has more work then I did, and then M still has. We both are annoyed.
3. Allergies: My mom and brother both have allergies. Never before have I had this problem, and in the past year they have gone crazy. And in the past week…a wreck. Can’t breathe. Eyes Watering. Sneezing. So done.
4. Fantastic Bad TV: I love ABC Family. Cause it’s a “new type of family,” and that means it is all about open and embracing scandalous shows. Including the newest show, the Secret Life of an American Teenage. And let me tell you, the whole high school is sleeping with each other. It’s absurd and hysterical. Cause the number of ridiculous quotes is great. Law School Friend is coming over to watch it with me tonight!
5. Life: This is the real crisis. I have no idea what I’m doing with my life. And not that I am going to have another job turnover soon, but I keep thinking that I may go back into the historical field. Out of stressful politics and into the happy world of history. Where the most stressful thing is donations for the upkeep of historical places and the payment of my salary. Or, do I want to go to culinary school.
6. Guys: On her 17 hour flight, apparently my mom found me a guy. Should I be nervous…yes.

However, besides that…life is good and my waistline isn’t shrinking (darn it)

So after my fairly boring Friday, I was prepped for a day of equal boredum. However, it was to be tanning boredum as my Saturday was to include a trip to the beach…which in my I don’t wear a bathing suit world meant a sundress, chick lit novel and a giant hat. I was excited. And the thunderstrom rolled in to the area and the party hostess faux called off the shindig. So instead, other plans had to be made…and whoa did I make them.

Early afternoon: helped M move to her apartment and that was fun times. Her apartment is super cute and the best part, near me!! YAY.

Late Afternoon: Met up with Law School Friend, S and her sister. There was food, and there was ice cream (round 2 from yesterday).

Early Evening: Meal, round 2, with M and old boss. So great! Old boss is working on a campaign now, and I joke not…writing a romance, western novel in her spare time. We heard the whole plot today, it was great and so written from a female perspective which is the funniest thing ever.

Late Evening/Early Morning: I went out with E and C. And oh my gosh, was that a show. I met up with them at E’s apartment and already has a mass amount of alcohol been consumed (this is where I disclose that I consumed 2 honey moons, 2 miller lites, and 1 stoli blueberry and sprite). They were absurd and hysterical. There were crazy dancing moments and a trip to my least favorite bar area of the city. But it was great. There was music and there was running away from sketchy guys looking to find a drunk girl. E and I may have had a laugh or two at their expense.

More info when I’m awake. :)

The fourth of July has been done in my time zone for about 15 mins, and wow was it an exciting one for me. That last line was maybe a bit sarcastic. So I woke up, went to Whole Foods and then made muffins for A and Law School Friend. Then I saw fireworks with involved a bus and making it right when they started. There was ice cream and pita sandwiches, and all in all a quite day. Why we may wonder? Cause I am beyond mopey.

I can’t even explain why. But needless to say I have been mopey and pathetic for days. I mean it’s so bad that I didn’t blog during the week for fear of inundating the internet with posts that all reference bad pop lyrics and how they make me feel. And let’s be honest, no one wants to read that…not even me sometimes. So instead I sat around my apartment and moped, cause that I am good at. :)

But back to today. So today we had Peanut Butter and Jelly (Before)

and Peanut Butter and Jelly (After)…in muffin form:

They were great, cause I mean…all week all I’ve wanted is a PB&J sandwich and I kepts forgetting to buy bread. So instead I made muffins. And because I am a strange duck who loves bad puns, they are kind of like me…nutty on the outside, gooey on the inside (yeah, I went there). But needless to say, the muffins were great, they may be added to the future bakery list.

Peanut Butter and Jelly Muffin

1/2 cup Creamy Peanut Butter
1/2 cup Jam, Jelly or Preserves
2 cups sifted all-purpose flour
1 heaping tablespoon baking powder
1 cup milk
2 eggs
1/2 cup sugar
1 teaspoon salt

Preheat oven to 400ºF. In bowl, stir together flour and baking powder; set aside.

Place milk, eggs, sugar, Jif peanut butter and salt in a blender, mixer or food processor; blend to combine. Pour over dry ingredients; stir just to moisten.

Line a 12-muffin pan with paper muffin cups. Fill the lined cups 1/3 full. Place about 1 teaspoon of Smucker’s jam, jelly or preserves in the center of each muffin. Fill muffin cups with additional batter until about 2/3 full.

Bake for 15 to 20 minutes. Remove from the oven and allow to cool in the pan about 5 minutes.

Makes 12 servings.

This weekend was insane, in both a good and comme ci comme ca way. (Oh my heavens, I just blogged in French, I’m disappointed in myself).

But all in all, I have come to a realization. I love my new church people. For a long while, the people my parents went to church with after they moved made me crazy. They were hypocritical and judgmental, I mean God forbid you had a drink…you were on your way to heathensville. My new church, they are normal people…and I’m sure their are the judgmental types (cause I mean, there are people who judge in all walks of life), but this is a church that believes in reconciliation and forgiveness more than the normal issues that are all around religious movements. But it’s really nice to be known in the community. When during communion they call you by name, and the day after you get an email from someone that you didn’t think knew who you were…I mean it’s great!

Now on to work. Work was not to shabby today. Not the best day, but how nice is this to say…only three more days in the week. Yeah Independence Day!